Sunday, September 9, 2007

Henry Rollins: Action Hero

So I just watched Wrong Turn 2: Dead End and I must be the slowest man alive because I didn't even know Henry Rollins was the star until I saw him (in it). I was a fan of the original because, well, I love shitty horror movies, I love gore, and of course in-bred deformed mountain folk. The original had Eliza Dushku (Faith from Buffy) so thats something, but Henry Rollins as a retired marine colonel named Dale Murphy, kicking deformed mutants asses, well thats just awesome. The trailer should state first of all; Henry 'Fucking' Rollins... in... The movie is your typical Texas Chainsaw rip-off but entertaining none-the-less. It takes place in the back woods of Carolina, a new reality tv show is being filmed called "The Ultimate Survivor", Rollins is the host, the premise of the show is a post apocalyptic survival test, complete with fake radiation poisonings and so forth. Of course all goes bad when the local mutated freaks get a sniff of the young female contestants, and then the bloodbath begins with body parts a-flying and intestines a-showing. In the first 5 minutes a woman is cut in half down the centre, her intestines splashing on the road, then she is dragged off by two crazies. BUT heres the kicker, Rollins fights back, armed with dynamite arrows and a bow-and-arrow. So needless to say there is a lot of in-bred guts splashing on walls. So Henry Rollins: Action Hero; does it work? Well put it this way if you get 2 Dolph Lundgrens, 1 Arnold and a bag of Van Dammes you get half a Henry Rollins, complete with bad one-liners (after a successful kill). So does this movie suck? You bet your ass it does, but Rollins doesn't and that's a reason to watch it, also there's the gore factor, arrows through heads, axes in heads and of course the intestine thing. So I'm here to say (or write) hire out this film and watch it, why not! It's better than fucking Grays Anatomy.

3 comments:

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